CheRae

CheRae
Growth as an actor and as a human being are synonymous

Thursday, February 1, 2018

Failure February

February 1st podcast hear it here:


Welcome to CheRae on the Way, where I am in no position to give you advice, so I am taking you on a journey of me fixing myself. It is February and this podcast started as a new year’s resolution to better myself and leave something in the world that wasn’t there before. But being realistic, what the last blog/podcast was about, I know new year’s resolutions do not always work out the way we think. I am being honest enough to admit that I am changing my one post a month goal to two posts a month, because I have so many thoughts, and it forces me to see and hear my goals and faults. So I am excited to challenge myself with this new goal. Now the changes to my resolutions were not always seemingly positive. I also have taken some before pictures for my work out goals, and have failed to set a predictable schedule that I can stick to. That change to my goal of working out at least 3 times a week is not a good one but am I working out more? Yes, was it the same as my initial goal, no. But acknowledging that I have room to grow, means I have another chance to succeed.
If you are new to the podcast, which everyone is because this is only episode three, than you probably don’t know too much about my spending plan that I am doing. I got the idea from the podcast Optimal Finance Daily. I strongly suggest you listen to that podcast. I am tracking all my expenses in an excel spreadsheet and I had an amazing experience recently. I went to put an expense in my expense tracker and it was already there. Good practices becoming habit. Yay me! I am surprised and happy for my successes with my goals, but know that failure is inevitable. For example while I had success with one expense I also forgot to account for another reoccurring expense. And am still short for some required bills. Meaning I am living paycheck to paycheck. I am learning. Tracking my expenses makes me think twice before buying things, because I know I will have to put it in later, and having it glaring back at me on my computer makes me want to avoid inputting withdraws. I also make expenses red, a color that psychologically says bad to me. So that expenses are mostly necessities not frivolities. I am still failing at that, because date nights with friends are important to me. So I try to do them and spend very little. But the ultimate goal is to only go out when I have the money to that. Not like I have $100 so I can spend $50. I need to start creating a constant and reliable cushion of at least $300. Then maybe I can get a savings of at least $2000 like the financial advisor told me. Well I am working on getting my house rented out, I am also relearning math so I can get back into school, and I got a good reliable job with opportunity for advancement and sometimes it’s fulfilling work. So I wanted to share that so you know that these are steps I am taking not just empty dreams but goals because I have a plan to reach them.
As for my fitness goals. I fell off the gym routine fairly quickly, and failure was a possible result. So I started doing squats in the kitchen, and walking between buildings I would normally drive to at work.  But if I keep pushing myself, I am going to learn to love going to the gym. I have to find the good in my failures. No gym means, learning to at home workouts. Forgotten expense means starting the expense tracker was a good idea.
There is no better way to find the good in a bad situation than to find a positive spin on a hard situation. For example for almost every struggle there is another version of it used to seek enlightenment. Take hunger. One person’s plight and anguish is what another does voluntarily to gain a clear mind or better health or maybe even religious benefits. When you can’t buy the newest thing, remember minimalism and decluttering is changing lives all over the world. Next time your budget is saying nothing but ramen for the next two weeks, think of it as a time to reflect on what could be done to make this predicament less likely in the future. Sometimes hard times are just inevitable and in those situations learn to take the time your internet gets shut off to discover the public library in your neighborhood. Not having gas is a great time to enjoy a bike ride, learn what free events are in your area (like hikes, volunteer opportunities), take odd jobs  you enjoy (painting, tutoring, give lessons, babysitting, dog sitting, house cleaning, write for contests or blogs), maybe make  your limited shopping budget a chance to try a new budget friendly meal. My favorite budget buys are rice, frozen vegetables, canned goods, pasta, pasta sauce, and meat (chicken breast, ground beef, and lunch meat). Of course buy the foods you like, search for OFF brand, and try to not deprive yourself. If you are feeling tacos from your favorite restaurant you might find it cheaper to make it yourself and have leftovers. Also you get to make it exactly how you like it. Can’t cook? No worries, not only do cook books help, but now there are videos on youtube that can walk you through everything. Same principle can be applied to when your lights go out, think of all the yoga and medication that happens in dark rooms with candles. So next time hard times come up, have that situation make you stronger and smarter. Learning form mistakes is crucial. Will Smith has a video out that talks about failure in a spectacular but truthful way. One of the things that stood out to me was the quote about the gym. How appropriate only two months into 2018?
He mentions something along the lines of the fact that we can‘t be afraid to fail, and to even fail often. We go to the gym with the sole purpose of failing. You work out ‘til failure.  I have heard this principle from other fitness enthusiasts, push yourself to failure, because failure builds muscle and gives you a goal to beat next time. I encourage you to check out the video link below. This is the reality of failure we all need to take into account. Especially in a social media driven world. We can sometimes only see other’s successes and never notice the trail of failures that got them there. One must learn to not only embrace their failures, but look forward to them.
This is an easier said than done moment for me. I replay embarrassing moments in my head years after they have happened. It will make me shudder in present day for gaffs that have happened many years ago. But just because I fail at that does not mean that I should not keep trying to build a healthy relationship with failure. This is something that without logical steps to achieve it seems impossible. So what could some of those steps be? I think the first step is confidence. If you’re confident in yourself then your failures will seem like exactly what they are, a seemingly unnoticeable mis-stroke in a beautiful painting.  When a child is learning to walk and falls down 50 times they never think “this isn’t for me.” I was not able to find out where this quote came from but I think it is a great example of how failure plays out in the grand scheme of things. Think of success like walking. And if walking is a bad example for you, for people of all abilities, think of this as flying for birds, or swimming for fish, they must do it, just as you must succeed.

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